The Myth of the To-Do List
For most of the evolutionary period of our brains, written language was not an option. In fact, the widespread availability to write down what we need to remember occupies only the tiniest slice of our evolutionary history. Our brains evolved to remember important things using memorization.
It’s why we are able to remember important family stories, retain pre-written histories and keep important tasks front and center. Unfortunately, our brain’s tremendous memorization capabilities can also encourage less helpful habits like repetitive thought and rumination (thinking the same thing or reliving memories over and over again).
To-do lists are a wonderful way to alleviate these negative patterns, they tell your brain it’s okay to let go of those thoughts. 100% absolutely would recommend a to-do list to ease worries and clear your mind (journaling helps with this, too).
But there is a rampant myth surrounding to-do lists. They’re not a one and done document. They’re a living document and the lie that stresses us out is the expectation that all items will be accomplished, your to-do list can be finished and then you’ll feel great and life will be easy.
“The answer does not lie in inventing more time to complete your to-do list, it’s in reimagining your relationship with it. ”
The truth is that your to-do list will never be finished. You can cross things off, but it’s a safe bet that in a few hours you’ll need to add on even more items. And it’s supposed to be that way!
Instead of a holy grail directing your life, could you let your to-do list be a guidepost? Could you shift your goal from completion of the list to the satisfaction of accomplishing just what needs doing? In this way, the goal of a to-do list is not to cross off every item, the goal of your list creating a tool to most efficiently direct your energy.
If you came here for productivity tips, you’re in the wrong place. We actually think you should do less. A lot less. But you might begin to shift your relationship with your to-do list by lightly prioritizing this never ending, stress inducing list. Each day on a Post-It, write down three to five things (this number will vary based upon how much you break down tasks into smaller items and the very nature of your tasks) that must be completed today. They are your must-dos. Do those. Stop. If you have time and energy, tackle another line item with the understanding that everything after your prioritized items are gravy.
If you find you can’t whittle down your list to just your absolute must-dos, it’s worth considering that you have unrealistic expectations of production. Begin to gently investigate that tendency -- do you really need to do those things? Why? There are at least a few tasks could fall away and the world would keep spinning. We promise.
To-do lists are a fantastic tool (A++ will do business again!) and yet, they mean relatively nothing in the scope of your inherent worth, the amount of rest and relaxation you deserve and the meaning of your life.